Melting our hearts!

I just had to share this picture of Chloe that Travis took tonight while I was holding her. She's been smiling for weeks, but we've had a hard time getting her to look right at the camera while she's doing it and getting the picture at just the right moment. Good job daddy! Chloe is doing really well, I just scheduled her two month doctor's appointment for October 13th. We can't believe we're getting so close to the two month marker! We've got her on a great routine. She sleeps peaceably in her swing for naps during the day and is getting used to sleeping on her back and side at night in her bassinet. She wakes up only to eat one or two times a night, but I think she'll be sleeping through the night before we know it since she's such a good self soother. Emma still has some jealousy of her sister from time to time that we have to deal with, but can also be very sweet with her and is very helpful much of the time. Parenting these two little girls is such a joy, despite the challenging moments. We are so blessed!

A Home

Now first, let me be surface with you. The excitment of building a new house is upon us. Every time we go over there, something new has been started or finished, and it's so fun to see the progress. Every time I wander through the framing I picture where furniture will go and what colors I might paint the walls. But even more exciting to me is the thought of "settling down" there. Finally, we will own a home that we actually get to live in for an indefinite amount of time. When I think of all the memories that will be created there, meals cooked and enjoyed, the laughter that will fill the halls, as well as the tears at times I'm sure. The holidays, the friends, the brothers and sisters in Christ that will come and go leaving the sweet fragrence of their love and life each time. It makes me sigh with an unstopable grin just to think about it. But down a little deeper, will this house really be my home? As the old saying goes, "the home is where the heart is" right? Well, if my heart is wrapped up in this house, this physical place I will call home, then it's in the wrong place. Some of you are probably confused by this statement I'm sure, but let me venture a little deeper. As a woman, and maybe just as a part of the make up of my personality too, I am a "homemaker" by nature. I feel that my house and the feeling it gives off when others are there is an expression of myself. I want to create an environment of peace and warmth, good smells, soft cushons and fabrics, good things for the eyes to look at, all the things that make a person want to be there. Now I don't always succeed at creating this environment, especially these days as I adjust to being the mother of two needy children. But the desire is always there, as well as the feeling of failure when I haven't prepared a creatively tasty hot meal or kept the house as clean and neat as I want it to be. But when I look at this list, I realize there is something missing. I may get to spend a mere 70-80 years on this earth, but there is an eternity after that to be lived in heaven. So all logic tells you, 70 years compared to eternity is not what you would call home. It's like calling a hotel room home. So if I truely want to make my house a home, others need to feel like they are in the presence of the Lord when they are there. They need to feel as I do when I visit with friends who are walking closely with Him, like they have breathed a breath of fresh air that makes the air in the outside world seem suddenly stale. They need to feel challenged and inspired and refreshed and loved beyond measure. So while sweet smells and cleanliness and comfort are all important in the efforts of "homemaking", each of them is worth nothing if I am not living my faith in such a way that those around me are feeling blessed and built up. This is a heavy challenge, one I humbly admidt I fail miserably at all the time. But in my own conviction, I am sharing these thoughts and insights with you so that you may be encouraged and challenged as well. If Jesus is our home, let His love and light be the warmth and flame of our homefires. Let us not get trapped in the Martha Stewart mentality of impressing others while hiding our clutter under the beds. Let's be real with each other, share our struggles, and walk alongside each other as we demonstrate the Body of Christ to the world. This is what I'm learning, please share your insights with me as well. Here are some pictures of the progress of our house.
Love, Sarah

More Chloe Pictures

Napping, Erkle style! This picture was taken today.

Sleeping like a baby, ahh... If only the adults in our house were getting great sleep. But we'll get there right! Chloe is already sleeping some 4-5 hour stretches at night, which was better than Emma was doing at this stage in the game. We're not sure if it's Chloe's "easier" temprament or the fact that we are becoming more "Baby Wise", but I'm guessing it's a combination of both.

Checking out her world, Chloe Paige is awake a little more now during the day, which is so much fun. I haven't been able to capture it on camera yet, but she does this adorable little face when she's focusing on something where she puckers her lips to form an "O" and flares her nostrils with eyes intently on her object of interest. She's even graced us with her first smiles, talk about heart melting! I remember when Emma gave us her first gummy grin, there just aren't words for moments like those.Chloe's favorite spot, mommy's arms. Although she doesn't get to be in them nearly as much as her big sister did unfortunately. Oh the plight of the second born, subject to big siblings agressive hugs and kisses, nursing sessions interupted by big sister needing discipline. I guess each one in line has it a bit harder, but hopefully it will make her more resilient.

Okay, so maybe there are some things that are harder about being number two, but you also get more love coming your way! Emma really does love her baby sister, she's always so excited to see her when she wakes up from a nap. In her baby talk, she coos, "oh Co-ee", or "look at her lil feet", or "can I hogeher mommy?"Chloe with Grammy and Papa. When she's lucky enough to beat her sister for the attention, Chloe loves time with her grandparents. In just a week we'll be heading down to the Springs so she can meet her great grandparents and great Aunts, Uncles, and second cousins.
Deep thoughts during a diaper change.

One month old

We can hardly believe that four weeks have passed since our little Chloe Paige was born. Time sure flies faster with the second baby. I hit the ground running every morning and am never for lack of something to do. In fact, for the first time in awhile I'm finding it hard to get even the basics done. Whoever thinks that motherhood and homemaking isn't a fulltime job, please try a day in my shoes and your thinking will change. It's more than a fulltime job, it's a 24/7 job! But I'm loving it, I really truely am. I know these years of having very young children will go way too fast and I will miss it, so I'm trying to treasure every moment and not get so stressed about all the things I'm not able to accomplish in a day. I'm finding that keeping my goals for each day small and realistic, I'm having success and that always feels good. About these pictures, what a difference a month makes eh?! Here's some more fun comparison for you. The last picture is of Emma, also at one month old. They do look like sisters, but very different too. Two beautiful daughters, how blessed I feel! On a side note, we had lots of fun picking interior options for the new house yesterday. We still have lighting and faucets to choose, it's all so much fun! Framing is pretty much completed, I'll post some more pictures after I take some tonight. They are telling us we'll close mid November to early December, right before the holidays. Now we need to find renters to take over our lease for our current home, prayers for that to go smoothly would be greatly appreciated. Have a wonderful weekend.
Love, Sarah

SOLD!

Good news! We are under contract for our townhome in Salt Lake! We'd like to give our friend and realtor Pat a HUGE thank you for all his hard work for us. This is a huge burden lifted off our shoulders, thank you all for your diligent prayers and encouragement. We didn't make quite what we hoped on it, but what we did make is a huge blessing from the Lord and will definitely help us as we move towards the purchase of our next home. Speaking of our next home, something exciting is in the works. We're under contract with a builder literally down the street from Travis's parents. The homes are unique and the builder has a great reputation. It's not 100% for sure yet, we have to close on our townhome before we will say that, and luckily the builder has let us write that in as a contingency. We also need to meet with the lender to make sure we can afford the payments and get the financial end of things squared away. It's the kind of home that we could see ourselves staying in for years to come and growing into. It's a beautiful ranch style home with an unfinished basement that we can finish down the road. It's on the side of town we want, has huge old trees in the surrounding area, and is right next to a farmers feild that is technically a flood plane, so we don't forsee it being developed. It feels like we are out in the country a bit, which we love! Here are some pictures of the floor plan and a rough sketch of what the outside will look like from the front. I've also included some pictures of where we're at in the framing stage. We go to the design center this week to pick cabinets and interior options and upgrades. It will be so much fun this time to actually get to live in the home we build! We should close in early December, right before the Christmas season. We are counting our blessings daily and praising the Lord for them. I'll keep you posted, and more pictures of the girls will be coming soon.

Love, Sarah

To be or not to be...a parent

A question from a dear friend prompted this post. As I sit, in the thick of motherhood, sleepless nights, household chores left undone and beckoning, I thought what better time to answer the question, "is it worth it to have children?" You must know from the get go that I will answer this question in all honesty. I do, after all, pride myself on being real and vulnerable. I actually have three friends who are about to embark on this journey of parenthood, two of which have a healthy dose of doubt as they enter this phase in their lives due to their nannying background. Travis and I were driving home the other evening and we noticed some college girls going for a walk together. I noted, "ah the days when I was at the center of my universe and I determined all the activities of my day". I remember when bedtime was a time of my choosing, when I got to sleep a full eight hours without interuption and often wake up when my body felt it was ready to. I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss those days. But to answer the question, "is it worth it to have children?" I can answer it simply by rephrasing the question, "Is it worth it to offer ourselves as vessels and stewards of God's most glorious creation, human life?" The answer? A resounding YES! Don't get me wrong my friends, I'm not saying that life will be easy when you become a parent, in fact, it can and most likely will be the most challenging role of your life. But I also know that anything worth anything often treads the most challenging path. Life becomes much richer, much deeper, much more of what life was meant to be when we are challenged. When you become a parent, you are forced to look into the clearest, cleanest mirror and take a good look at who you are without the masks we become so accustomed to wearing. You are forced, not only to decide what's really important, but to make daily life decisions based on those beliefs. Suddenly, being genuine in your walk has more consequences than it did before, little eyes are watching and little ears are listening. And your need for the Lord's provision and wisdom and strength becomes blazingly apparent, not that it was any less before you were a parent, but parenthood tends to humble us in such a way that we see our need more clearly. Yes, after reading all kinds of books and listening to all kinds of advice, you will have to make hard decisions about discipline and raising and you will constantly doubt yourself, wondering if you are doing what is best. Your children will be born sinners, just as you were, and it will be no easy task to tame and guide that sinful nature and hopefully point them towards the saving grace of Christ. No, you will not be able to take off on a whim to travel the world and no, you will not be able to sleep in for many years to come. Yes, you will have to work at nurturing yourself and all your relationships, especially you marriage, more than you did before children and no, your stomach won't ever be the same ladies. All this said, if you choose not to have children, you will never know the beauty of beholding a precious little person who is an intricate blend of you and your mate and yet completely their own person. You will never know the joy of hearing "I love you" come from the mouth of your child, and knowing that it's still true even when they're giving you their worst behavior. You will miss out on the closest you will ever come to understanding God's love for us. Nope, their are no guarantees they will "turn out" the way you hope, they are not yours after all, they are the Lord's and they must choose Him just as you did. Your heart will break when you see them struggle or make bad decisions and it will leap with joy over their triumphs. My friends, I can't make the decision for you, nor can I predict the future of what your parenting experience will be. All I can do is speak from personal experience and my heart when I say that I would never trade a minute of the challenge and blessing of parenthood for a lifetime of living only for myself. Don't lose yourself or become child centered, that won't serve you, your children or your spouse at all. You need to nurture your spirit, make time for the things that bring you joy and stimulate your mind, body and soul regularly, and put your marriage and your spouse before your children. But, don't miss out on one of the greatest of human experiences. Whether you become a parent by blood, adoption, or through your love of the body of Christ, don't miss out! That's my opinion, take it for what it's worth.

All my love,

Sarah

More pictures

Hello everyone! Many of you have been asking for more pictures of miss Chloe, so here they are. Sorry it's taken awhile for me to get them up, but my guess is I don't need to explain. Chloe has actually been doing really well at night, I have to wake her up for feedings usually. She'll sleep just about anywhere and we've been able to arrange her fussy periods so they happen during the day. Nursing is going beautifully, I'm finally past the most painful period. All in all, this adjustment is much smoother than I emagined. I know I'll probably be in for a brand new adjustment after my mom leaves in a week and a half, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Thank you all for well wishes, support, and offers for meals, we greatly appreciate it. The best time for meals will be after my mom leaves the first of September.
Love, Sarah